Proverbs 4:10 “Hear, my son, and accept my words, that the years of your life may be many”
Sometimes in life, God brings a person into your life that has a message that you may not want to hear, but that if you do hear it then you will be a better person for it. And when I am using the word “hear” here, I am thinking along with the terms of hearing with a preconceived intention to put into practice what is being imparted.
Reflective listening is a truly wonderful habit. We listen without interrupting. We listen without thinking of our answer, our opinion, or even our experience. We lay aside all the chatter in our mind, and we listen with the intention of repeating back, in our own words, to the person speaking, what we think they are telling us.
It’s habit five of Steven Covey’s Seven Habits. Seek first to understand before being understood. We are placing value on the other person, we are ensuring they know they have been seen, and heard, and understood. We may not agree with the person, but we are not aiming for an agreement just yet, we are simply understanding.
When I was a young manager, a friend took me aside one day and took time to explain an aspect of transactional analysis in behavioural science. He explained how conversations have participants, and these participants can act as parents, children or adults. He helped me see what a “parent-parent” conversation can look like, both people believing they were in charge and not listening to the other. Or, a “parent-child” one person telling the other what to do, and the other refusing to do it. He asked me to position myself in these roles and asked where do I see myself. I got it right away, I was the “parent-child”, always in charge, always wanting my way, not listening and even demanding my own way at times.
Then we talked about “adult-adult” conversations, where we focused on the facts, and not our feelings. We practised a few conversations about difficult subjects where we both positioned ourselves as adults. I got it, I understood, I heard, and I determined there and then to change.
KNOWLEDGE
This is the eighth time in the last 100 verses that the writer has used the term “my son”. The term is used 22 times in all in the book of Proverbs [ESV].
We are being reminded to ourselves that we are connected, that we are part of a family, that we have a father who is genuinely interested in every single thing we do, in every single thought we have, in every single decision we make, and desperately wants to equip us to experience the abundance that is available, attainable, and achievable in relationship with Him.
Every word spoken by God has spiritual life contained in it. A bit like in Jurassic Park how the original seed of life was contained for millions of years stored within a piece of amber rock, here the seed of life is spiritual, and is hidden in the eternal rock [Isaiah 33:22 -When my glory passes by, I will put you in a cleft in the rock and cover you with my hand until I have passed by] and [Deut 32:4 He is the Rock, His work is perfect; For all His ways are justice, A God of truth and without injustice; Righteous and upright is He].
The song by the Dave Crowder Band – “Oh how He loves us” contains beautiful words in one of the verses –
And we are His portion and He is our prize
Drawn to redemption by the grace in His eyes
If grace is an ocean, we’re all sinking
So Heaven meets earth like an unforeseen kiss
And my heart turns violently inside of my chest
I don’t have time to maintain these regrets
When I think about the way
David Crowder*Band – How He Loves (Official Music Video)
God’s plan is to fill our hearts with his love, his purpose, his character, his designs, and his favour.
UNDERSTANDING
Let’s pick one word from this verse to look closer at and see if that can help us gain a deeper insight into how God would love us to live?
The word “hear” is pronounced in Hebrew as “sama” and appears 1165 times in the Old Testament. It is translated in the ESV into words such as, hear; heard; listened; obeyed; understood; diligently listen; and, faithfully obey. So we can see that it’s not just simply to hear, but there is an intention to obey implied in the listening.
WISDOM: how much room is there in your heart for God’s love and God’s word today?
STRENGTHS THOUGHT: Belief knows already what its’ values are and what has intrinsic worth. Make sure your vision is connected to sufficient resources.
Allan’s Unauthorised Version – [fully understand with the intention of fully obeying and carrying my sayings close to your heart. Then the fullness of your internal and external life will be long-lasting and abundantly full of God’s favour.]
PRAYER: Father, thank you for today. Please help me to read and hear your words with a heart and soul that has already decided to be willingly and cheerfully obedient. Thank you.
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Thank you pastor Allan. Such a wonderful share. I love that when we listen to God – it is always adult – child hearing …
Ready to listen and obey. I guess even if we don’t understand.
What a great reminder to hear and listen from our Father. I love how we have that relationship with our father who is genuinely interested in everything we do, in every single decision we make.
I love this- God’s plan is to fill our hearts with his love, his purpose, his character, his designs, and his favour.
Thank you Ps Allan.
Thank you for today’s message Pastor Allan. Being intentional and attentive with my attention to God’s voice is what I need to deveop. The same towards my ineraction with people because my attention span can be very selective and relative.
A good reminder that when we listen closely and follow we will find ourselves in the safest place…the centre of God’s will. Also, we are more likely to stay in our functioning adult when we are secure in God and relying on Him for strength.
Love that song. So beautiful.
Great strength thought. I want my heart to have so much room for Him each and every day of my life and to feel His wrap around presence and love all the days of my life.
Beautiful reminder this morning Ps Allan.
od’s plan is to fill our hearts with his love, his purpose, his character, his designs, and his favour. – Yes and Amen!
What a blessing of a fruitful and long life If we would only obey. Every word of God has life. What a thought! What a joy ! Enjoy life!
Thank you Pastor Allan – such an incredibly moving song ‘Oh how He loves us!’
Another further beautiful term of endearment speaking to me His child reminding me that He is my Father & I belong to His family! God’s words are filled to the brim with wisdom & so as a loving Father Who loves me more than anyone ever will He is exhorting me to embrace them wholeheartedly because He wants my life to be one of longevity & to be one of great abundance & fulfillment. This can only happen when I seek His face hear His voice & follow in His ways with the deliberate intention of obeying Him before I even know what He may ask of me.
Reflective listening— teaching us to listen and understand first before replying, agreeing or disagreeing. God has a wealth of wisdom for us to draw on, if we listen to His voice and understand His word and be enveloped in His unfailing love.
Thank you, Pastor Allan.
Was amazed to learn today that our conversations have participants.
As a child a parent and an adult.
I’m thankful to know that in our conversation with God ,he genuinely is interested In us.in our thoughts and our emotions and our actions.
How truly beautiful and rare is that.
I feel so blessed to be loved by someone who loves me without any conditions.
Thank you Jesus .
Thankyou Allan for your wonderful teachings each day I always learn something new or enrich my understanding of God’s Word because of your insight !
I don’t think I’ve ever been to group supervision with my current supervisor (3years) and not had Denise talk to us about the value of being motivated by curiosity in our sessions with clients. This word curious has been a solid positive influence on the way I interact with people it helps me truely listen.